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Finding A Wife

Cut to John Rickman kind individual with cap which he raises. You will find white rails behind him which can be a racecourse

Rickman (Michael) : Good afternoon and welcome to Wife-Swapping from Redcar. And also the big news this afternoon is the fact that the Uk boy Boris Rogers has succeeded in swapping their nine-stone Welsh-born spouse for the Ford Popular and an entire collection of Dickens. Well now, I am able to see they truly are prepared in the beginning therefore allow's discuss now for the beginning of the 3.30.

(Cut to shot that is high of road with about 10 houses for each part.)

Rickman: And first let us meet up with the latest news of this wagering.

CAPTION: No. 12 Betty Parkinson 7/4 on fav No. 27 Mrs E. Colyer 9/4 No. 14 Mrs Casey 4/1 5/1 club

Voice Over (Eric Idle) : quantity 12 Betty Parkinson 7 to 4 on favourite, quantity 27 Mrs Colyer 9 to 4, 5 to at least one club those.

Rickman: And here is the beginner Mrs Alec Marsh, (she climbs onto a rostrum and fires a gun) and additionally they're down.

(one of several doorways starts and a girl rushes next door into another household. Other doorways begin checking and down the road, with ladies criss-crossing out of every other's houses. About twenty moments for this mail order brides high task.)

Rickman: And Mrs Rogers may be the very very first to demonstrate, there she switches into Mr Johnson's, and Mrs Johnson across to Mr Colyer, followed by Mrs Casey from the inside. Mrs Parkinson, quantity 12, going well there into Mr Webster's through the Co-op, Mrs Colyer's making ground fast following a bad begin, she actually is away from Mr Casey's into Mr Parkinson's, she is a few lengths in front of Mrs Johnson who is nevertheless maybe maybe maybe not away from Mr Casey's. Mrs Penguin as well as quantity 8 Mrs Colyer -- those two now in the relative mind regarding the industry from Mrs Brown, Mrs Atkins, Mrs Parkinson, Mrs Warner and Mrs Rudd -- all nevertheless at Mr Philips's. Mrs Penguin making the operating now, challenged strongly by Mrs Casey, Mrs Casey coming extremely fast in the inside, it will be Mrs Casey coming from behind. Now she actually is making some slack on the exterior, Mrs Penguin operating . as well as the line, it is Mrs Casey who is started using it with a brief mind from Mrs Penguin in 2nd destination, Mrs Parkinson in 3rd, Mrs Rudd, Mrs Colyer, Mrs Warner and there is Mrs Griffiths whom's stayed unswapped.

(One woman is kept in the exact middle of the road. Scale back to Rickman during the program railing.)

Rickman: Well, a really race that is exciting, and I also have actually beside me now the guy whom owned and taught the champion, Mrs Casey -- Mr Casey. Done well, Jack.

Mr Casey (Terry Jones) : many thanks, John.

Rickman: Well, had been you after all amazed relating to this, Jack?

Mr Casey: No, certainly not, no she actually is been going perfectly in training, as well as Doncaster a week ago, and I fancy her very strongly for the Cheltenham week-end.

Rickman: Well, thank you quite definitely certainly, Jack. We should make you now since it's time for the united group event.

(Peter western kind figure in a dinner that is white standing with five feamales in ball gowns as well as 2 men.)

CAPTION: Come Wife-Swapping -- North West v the South East

Peter (Eric Idle) : Hello, and a really hot greeting through the Tower ballroom suite at Reading, where there is almost no on it, they truly are neck and throat, crop and grummit, genuine rack and seat, stone and bucket, horse and enamel, limit and thigh, arse over tip, they are positively wild birds of the feather, there is maybe not a brand new pin inside it, you mightn't obtain a melon among them. Well, now, every thing rests in the development occasion and right right right here comes the North western using the Mambo. Maestro, just take it away, please.

(Cut to two lines of ballroom dancers, ladies opposite gentlemen, sixteen completely. The women have been in nasty tulle, the gents in tails, with figures on the backs. Mambo music begins its intro. At the rear of the hall a big banner claims 'Mecca Wife-Swapping'. The guys bow as well as the women curtsey; each set joins fingers and so they await a few pubs. Then two groups begin getting each other and wrestling on the floor. an orgy that is vast out as they roll throughout the flooring. Cut quickly to Frank Bough in the 'Grandstand' studio.)

Frank Bough (Michael Palin) : now it's the perfect time for Rugby League, and shows of the afternoon's game between Keighley and Hull Kingston Rovers.

(Cut up to an industry where mud-caked league that is rugby, one group in hooped shirts plus the other in red, are becoming prepared for the scrum.)

CAPTION: Keighley 2 Hull K.R. 23

Eddie Waring (Eric Idle sound over) : Well, good afternoon and also as you can view, Hull Kingston Rovers are very well into the lead, it is a scrum down from the twenty-five for Keighley, Tom Colyer using the put-in, Mrs Colyer to be placed.

(The scrum has formed up, the scrum half has a dummy girl, tiny and light but real hunting, tucked under their arm as he steadies the scrum. He places her to the scrum, and following a complete large amount of throwing she actually is fundamentally heeled out.)

Eddie Waring: And there goes their spouse in to the scrum. And Hull 've got the heel resistant to the mind. Doing well with this specific scrum, some really picking that is good. Warrington's picked her up, is he planning to allow her to get, Wrigley's with him, grand lad is it.

(Mrs Colyer is found because of the scrum half whom makes a run with her. Handing down a powerful tackle and dodging he side steps and slips Mrs Colyer to a back who makes a run through and touches her down between the posts with her. The lady is left by them dumped straight down between the articles and set you back congratulate and hug one another.)

Eddie Waring: Well, that has been close to the whistle, Rovers walkin' it there, winnin' effortlessly by twenty-six points to two.

(Cut to Frank Bough once again in the 'Grandstand' set.)

Frank Bough: only a reminder that on 'Match for the time' tonight you can observe shows of two for this afternoon's big games: Mrs Robinson v Manchester United and Southampton v Mr Rogers, a game that is rather unusual. And listed here is a belated outcome. Coventry City nil, Mr Johnson's Una three -- Coventry taking place at home, there. Simply a reminder that is little the second sport you can view on BBC1 will likely to be 9.20 on Wednesday evening, whenever 'Wife Swapping with Coleman' comes reside from my spot. Till then, goodnight.

Continue steadily to the sketch that is next. Credits of the Year